Alibaba Escapes Death

Foremost comedian, Ali Baba, (Atunyota Alleluya Akpobome) has escaped death by whiskers.
The famous rib cracker has taken to his Instagram page to reveal how he narrowly escaped death on many occasions through series of posts… “I don’t pluck stories from the skies. I lived them. Like this one. 2 near death automobile experiences. Hmmm, that’s how I was sitting in the @areafada1’s Rehearsal studio, with a guy called #HealingChild and @efeokedi.”
“The studio door opens and a dreadlocked guy called Prophet, came to inform me that there was a journalist that wanted to see me. So I left the studio and went to see him. #WaleOlomu, had sent a message through the journalist, to me. Nigerian Institute of Journalism, Ogba was hosting an event and they wanted me to come. How much were they paying? The guy went into one long story of how it would give me visibility, all the Editors in the world would be in attendance blah blah blah, not because of those But because he came from #waleolomu, who at the time was with #FameMagazine, I used to hang out with them and did some cartoons for them, when #Sanya the awesome cartoonist (cant remember his other name) was unavailable, I agreed.”
“When is the event? Its tonight he replied. This was 1993. I was ready. They would come pick me up and I would be dropped off after the event. No sweat. They came in a green baby Benz 190 and picked me and Efe up at @giantajaloko’s place at 2pm. We got to NIJ at about 6pm. Well,…. I was not the only one they picked up. The show started before we got there. I got on stage much later. Like 2am. Anyway, show finished and we were to leave. The drop off car was different. It was a red 505 Peugeot. So, 2 guys joined Efe & l, in the back seat. One of the guys had an international flight to catch. I think it was to one African country. I remember telling the guy if he had gone by road, to the African country, we would have been ok at the back.”
“Anyway, on our way to drop the traveller, at about 5:30am, just as we passed the #ConcordNewspaper bend on that road linking old domestic to international, I still can remember clearly, that I thought I saw the guy driving nod off on the steering wheels. I tried to engage him with a joke, next thing, the car was somersaulting. Must have been more than 3 times. As it rolled over and over, I kept shouting one thing. Efe, was to tell me later, “Ali money go do you something”… what?”
“She said I kept shouting “My cheque! My cheque!!! My cheque!!!” How was I to know? To God almighty, I thought I was shouting “My Chest!”… Anyway, we later found #TheBookof5000JokesAndOneliners that I was reading. And true true, there was a cheque inside. A Trans International Bank crossed cheque of 65k. In 1993… But I still believe I was saying my chest.”
“The second near death accident was on our way back from the #CoscharisTableTennis tournament. The Hiace Bus bringing us from Nnewi somersaulted into the bush after a burst tyre. I was the second passenger in the front seats, next to the driver. As GOD would have it, I was looking for my sentimental cassette to change into my Walkman and had removed my seatbelt. In, I remember trying to lock back my seatbelt ehen the tyre burst. I was flung out, through the windscreen onto the hot Shagamu expressway and the bus continued its somersaults into the Bush. I was one of the only 3 people who had no serious injuries. The bus was full. I joined in bringing bodies to the road. #OsaAdun the owner of #DBN was on his way back from Benin… and stopped to help just as the convoy of a top military brass went pass, with sirens blaring.”
“Oga Osa recognized me and asked what happened. I was the only person of the 3 survivors that could talk. I told him. And we continued to carry the bodies. Some Journalists, others were tennis players and Coscharis officials. After loading all in different vehicles, including #OsaAdun’s 505 Peugeot, one good Samaritan offered to take me to a hospital. I told him drive me straight to Toyin Street, #WhiteWater, @mofedamijo’s office. We got there, and Bros was about driving off and as soon as I came out I slumped. I had lost so much blood from the gash behind my right ear. When we got to the hospital and they needed to give me blood, Bros said, “Make una give am blood wey gentle oo. This boy too stubborn. Him blood dey hot. I no tell you make you no travel?” One whole week. In that #FirstFoundation Hospital Opebi. And Bros will come in, in the morning and say, “Ehen, James Bond, as you no go do another show so, person die?” Learnt Major lessons. That day. When you charge for events”
“I learnt that if you are charging for an event that was outside Lagos, build in your inconvenience allowance. Also ensure that you charge a per diem and charge enough to handle your logistics by yourself.”
“Interestingly, I rescued all the production cameras, tapes and lights that belonged to #WillySowoh’s agency that handled the production and media coverage, and also booked me. The agency came to pick up the equipment and never compensated for the hospital bill or for even saving their equipment. #Coscharis never asked too. So many years later, when Coscharis tried to book me and asked for a discount… Even the owner of the Agency, some 4 years ago, called me to say his kid was getting married… I gave him a bill. He never came back.”
“Sometimes, you have to be hard in business. Make sure who you are bending backwards to please appreciate it. Otherwise, forgerrrrit meeeeeennnnn”

Categories: Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: